Emotions are feelings. Emotions whether positive or negative tend to occupy our thoughts and drive the choices we make. When your mind is preoccupied by negative emotions it’s like having a mental cold. Have you noticed that colds seem to get worse at night and in the morning? At night you lay down, all is still and the only thing your mind can focus on is your discomfort. So you get up and take something to dry up your nose and knock you out so you can sleep. We do the same thing when we are over wrought with emotion. We cry and our minds spin out of control down that negative vortex of “I’ll get you for making me feel this way!” You get up take some magic pill and go to sleep…only to wake to the same scenario. Well guess what? YOU get to choose your thoughts. Easier said than done.
The morning is much the same with a cold. The medication from the night before has worn off. Your nose is clogged and your head feels like a bowling ball. Yet after you take a hot shower, have a cup of coffee or tea and get moving you feel much better. The distractions of the day help change your focus to the needs at hand. Yep, the same holds true for emotions. That horrible negative spiral soon subsides as the responsibilities of life take precedence. Fortunately the gnashing of teeth is soon replaced with the beauty of a new day with new opportunities.
There are some simple solutions to shift your focus. Stop looking at outside circumstances and start focusing on what will make you feel better. Is that exercise, getting together with friends, attending church, a ladies/men’s group, eating properly and focusing on YOUR dreams, wishes and desires? Make the things that fill you with joy your priority. A great question to ask is: Will this negative situation make a difference tomorrow, next week, next month or next year? Changing your perspective and shifting to a place of gratitude is like taking mental cold medication. It clears your head of negativity and helps clear the way for a new vision.
As the Bee Gee’s penned: “It´s just emotion that’s taking me over” You get to choose the emotions that dominate both the choices and consequences of your one most precious life. Stop the blame game, turn away from whatever is irritating you and choose a higher call and let THOSE lovely emotions be what defines you. © 2012 by Beth Golden PhD , All Rights Reserved